Sunday, September 11, 2011

Phone Drones - The Curse of the 21st Century!

   Back in the olden days, way back before the turn of the century, some evil idiot-savant invented Cell Phones. The curse of mankind! Now we have what I call the Phone Drones. Those people who go through life without seeing or interacting with their fellow human beings except through their cell phones. The word drone refers to the worker honey bee who goes through life doing the same thing, without thinking, without change. Just doing what is programmed in it's DNA.

   The Phone Drones.


   When telephones used to be attached to the wall with wires, I never even thought that it would be a good idea to have a phone with me 24/7/365. I didn't feel the need to be in continual (if not continuous) touch with the rest of the world. If I needed to talk to someone and they were not within earshot, I would go home and call them.
   In an emergency, I would ask the nearest person if I could use their home phone. It was rare if someone would refuse to let you. It was an emergency, after all. In some cases, they'd call for you if their house was unkempt or someone was hanging out in front of the TV in their underwear, drinking beer.

   Today, it's rare to find someone who doesn't have a cell phone on their person. Even children have them! Some folks have two. Some don't even have a "Home Phone" (the kind with wires attached). They rely solely on their cell phones for human contact. Some Phone Drones would rather call someone before they will get up and walk to the next room to talk face to face! Scary... very scary.

   And wierd.

   Before you get the idea that I'm an anachronism and out of touch, I should tell you that I do own a cell phone. It's usually off and I mainly use it for emergencies or to "Check In" with my wife when I travel - it's one of the rules. If you're married, you'll understand.

   What I don't get is the apparent need for everyone and their brother to be talking to one another while they are driving, walking, watching TV, sitting on the toilet, watching a movie in a theatre, eating at a restaurant or while they are in line at the post office or at a store.  What is so urgent that these Phone Drones can't take two steps without a cell phone glued to their ear.
   What the heck are they talking about? Who has that much to say to someone?

   Don't even get me started about those so-called Bluetooth ear-pieces that many are addicted to. They look like something out of a science fiction movie. It's not going to be too long before before we'll see cell phones surgically implanted in your skull, then we'll see people walking around seemingly talking to themselves. (I'm there now and I don't even have my cell turned on!)

   The latest cell phones are so much more than telephones. They are cameras (still and video), they contain games that you can play when you really want to aggravate a senior citizen, they have "Apps" (applications) that allow you to turn off the lights in your house, pay for a pizza or a cup of coffee, find your way to wherever you need to be, connect to the Internet and the list goes on and on and on. These Drones are connected to life. Yeah, right!

   The thing about it is this: While these Drones are on their phones, they can't do much of anything else very well. Their driving is impaired, they can't concentrate on detailed tasks. They should not handle heavy machinery while talking on a cell phone. The more and more someone is on a cell phone, whether talking to someone or playing a game or whatever, is time that they are disconnected from reality. They have no sense of what is going on around them. This is what makes them dangerous, to themselves and others.

   Whenever I see a Phone Drone driving a car in traffic it scares me to death. Especially if I have to pass them or heaven forbid, I have to get in front of them! I count myself lucky when I don't get killed around them.

   Many states have outlawed driving while talking on cell phones. This creates Phone Drone Free Zones (you heard it here first!).

   If it weren't against the FCC rules and laws, it would be cool to carry a cell phone jamming device which would disable all cell phone signals within 100 feet of you. Just think of the POWER you would have to make your life so much more pleasant! Awesome!

   Let me suggest a two common courtesy rules for Phone Drones.

1. Phones off while in movie theatres, restaurants or anywhere there is anyone whom you might annoy.

2. Phones off while you are driving.

   Well that about covers it. Keep your phone off except for emergencies.

   Real emergencies!


   No one wants to hear one side of any conversation you might have. If you have to use your phone in public seek some sort of privacy before you begin to jabber away like a magpie. Why?  Because it's just plain rude!

   Maybe someone could erect small cell phone shelters on every street so the Phone Drones can talk in privacy. They could call them... Phone Booths. I'm like... such a genius!

   Take it from The Geezer: Don't annoy me with your cell phone conversation. I'm a geezer and I will call you out and embarass you in public...if that's even possible these days!


  1. I thought that I was the only one who hated this stuff. Keep it up!

  2. I agree - I have a cell but it's only used when I travel, to check in, and for emergencies. But then I'm old too.......

  3. Oh you two, I love my cell phone, but then I am still much younger than both of you. lol.....Lori


I'd be interested to hear your comments. Thanks for reading The Geezer Guide!